And there you have it folks. I don't think Shakespeare could have put it more adequately.
If it was a boy I would be calm. Boys I got figured out. Just teach them how to throw a ball, teach them how to throw a punch, and they can pretty much raise themselves.
But GIRLS?!
Girls don't even understand girls! Have you ever seen an article on the cover page of a magazine that says, "Find how what SHE's really thinking!"
No.
You haven't.
What exactly am I going to do with a girl? I don't have anything to teach a girl. What the heck do girls do anyway?
Also, and this is for the benefit of the guys out there, I had the doctor do a very thorough examination of Cassie's plumbing right after the ultrasound.
We were right.
Women don't come with a manual.
Honestly, I'm just at a loss. I can barely handle the woman I've got and now they're double teaming me.
It's a conspiracy, I tell ya.
Maybe... Maybe I can learn from this one. Maybe since I've been given a starter kit, I'll get some inside view into the mind of a woman, something that might help me understand them.
Or maybe I'll end up in a mental ward holding a Barbie doll and crying uncontrollably.
No, I'm over-reacting. Everything is going to be okay.
Right?
Right?
...
...I'm buying a bigger gun.
11 comments:
Oh Jonny..you are hilarious. You are going to surprise yourself because you will know what to do. Babies are babies in the beginning. Feed them, change them, rock them, love them. Pretty easy!!
Later...well, we won't discuss that yet. Just enjoy the pre-teenage years!
I have great faith in you! You know how to handle me! And that is not easy...ask Dan.
Thanks for your sense of humor and willingness to share and make me smile.
And...thanks SO much for the opportunity for Cassie to come and visit so I can see my baby pregnant and feel our munchkin moving around. I am so excited.
SO GLAD YOU ARE MY SON IN LAW!!
You'll be ok with a girl! I know you don't know Wes that well, but I am sure that Cassie can tell you that if Wes can handle girls, so can you! Seriously, Wes has 2 of them now and does as well with them as with the boys!
As a side note, your blog is hilarious, and we LOVE reading it! It's fun for me to get to know far away family a bit better this way!
As soon as you see your little girl, you won't be so worried. It's hard to explain but you just can't help falling in love. We're genetically altered to do that. It won't be so scary then. Until she becomes a teenager. And then, I feel for you. Good luck.
Don't worry Jonny, you don't have to know what to do. She will take care of that for you. You know that you are a goner. She will have you wrapped around her finger in a matter of days I am sure. You can't help but love them.
Don't buy into what any of these women are saying. Take this from a man who has been double teamed for almost a year. It is mental institution all the way. Can I have your old gun?
Lol..oh boys, we arent that bad. And you dont need an instruction manual just loves us, smile, and say of course you're right honey! Its that easy.
Cassie is right!!!
We'd love to heave another girl around here. The testosterone levels need some leveling out.
I hope that you HAVE, not HEAVE, a girl.
I wouldn't worry about having a girl... I would worry about all the boys that will be going after your little girl!!!
Jonny I don't know what you are going to do with two girls in the house. Just ask my mom about Cassie when she was a child.... she was a stinker, a BIG stinker, or in my mom's words, a pill. I will pray for you and your mental health.
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